NHL RELEASES WINE SERIES
Now I know here on HOCKEENIGHT, we've had a little fun with our goof
articles. Our feedback has ranged from people telling us they're
gold-plated gold, to dead fish being left on our doorsteps.
This, we swear to you, is not made up.
The NHL is releasing, for charity, a series of 11 wines, each to honor a different NHL "Legend". Who are these legends?
Bobby Hull, Gordie Howe, Ted Lindsay, Mike Richter, Tony Esposito, Dave Schultz, Bobby Clarke, Clark Gillies, Rod Gilbert, Pat LaFontaine and Rob Ray.
We at HOCKEENIGHT feel we can help with some of these, as far as what to put on the label.
Rod Gilbert - Drink it straight from the bottle. If you try to pour it, you'll never touch the cup.
Rob Ray - Pour some for your date, and watch her sweater come off.
Gordie Howe - You'll swear after you drink this you're the toughest guy in the room.
Mike Richter - Strong enough to make Pavel Bure have nightmares.
Dave Schultz and Clark Gillies - Don't try to mix these two. Unless you want to clean the blood off the carpet.
Ted Lindsay - Not as Terrible as its samesake.
Pat LaFontaine - This shit will scramble your brain.
Bobby Clarke - WARNING: This will impair your judgement into trading skill for size. Expect to wake up next to many hot girls' chubby friends.
Tony Esposito - One sip and you'll flop to the ice.
Bobby Hull - OK, just naming anything involving alcohol after Bobby Hull is pretty much its own punchline, so we're not even going to bother.
It looks like they're doing a Cabernet (red wine) and a Chardonnay (white), with two players from each of six teams. Of course, the NHL being the NHL, they missed the obvious angle here, not using the Maple Leafs, Canadiens or Bruins to round out the Original Six. Perhaps they'll try this for another series.
As all hockey fans know, there's nothing more satisfying than either a nice, firm, tannic Cab with perhaps some chocolate overtones and strong notes of oak, or a softer Chardonnay, with perhaps hints of pear, while kicking back, enjoying a baked Brie and watching some hockey.
The bottles are going for $14.99 each, and the dough goes to charity. So at least that part of it we'll stand up and applaud.
Perhaps next they should release a set of Maple Leafs' commemorative golf clubs.
This, we swear to you, is not made up.
The NHL is releasing, for charity, a series of 11 wines, each to honor a different NHL "Legend". Who are these legends?
Bobby Hull, Gordie Howe, Ted Lindsay, Mike Richter, Tony Esposito, Dave Schultz, Bobby Clarke, Clark Gillies, Rod Gilbert, Pat LaFontaine and Rob Ray.
We at HOCKEENIGHT feel we can help with some of these, as far as what to put on the label.
Rod Gilbert - Drink it straight from the bottle. If you try to pour it, you'll never touch the cup.
Rob Ray - Pour some for your date, and watch her sweater come off.
Gordie Howe - You'll swear after you drink this you're the toughest guy in the room.
Mike Richter - Strong enough to make Pavel Bure have nightmares.
Dave Schultz and Clark Gillies - Don't try to mix these two. Unless you want to clean the blood off the carpet.
Ted Lindsay - Not as Terrible as its samesake.
Pat LaFontaine - This shit will scramble your brain.
Bobby Clarke - WARNING: This will impair your judgement into trading skill for size. Expect to wake up next to many hot girls' chubby friends.
Tony Esposito - One sip and you'll flop to the ice.
Bobby Hull - OK, just naming anything involving alcohol after Bobby Hull is pretty much its own punchline, so we're not even going to bother.
It looks like they're doing a Cabernet (red wine) and a Chardonnay (white), with two players from each of six teams. Of course, the NHL being the NHL, they missed the obvious angle here, not using the Maple Leafs, Canadiens or Bruins to round out the Original Six. Perhaps they'll try this for another series.
As all hockey fans know, there's nothing more satisfying than either a nice, firm, tannic Cab with perhaps some chocolate overtones and strong notes of oak, or a softer Chardonnay, with perhaps hints of pear, while kicking back, enjoying a baked Brie and watching some hockey.
The bottles are going for $14.99 each, and the dough goes to charity. So at least that part of it we'll stand up and applaud.
Perhaps next they should release a set of Maple Leafs' commemorative golf clubs.
I'd still feel better about myself bringing one of these bottles to a dinner party than I would about bringing the Mike Ditka wines I saw at the store recently... I even heard the commercial on the radio today.. fucking hilarious
Reply to this