How to be Eurotrash...er a Red Wing
Step 1: Commit blatant penalty that prevents the other team from playing the puck
Step 2: ???
Step 3: Collect welfare er score goal.
The Penguins talked about how they learned all of the right lessons from losing last year’s Stanley Cup Finals to Detroit. It’s obvious that they learned nothing. The only lesson you can learn from Detroit is how to be Eurotrash. The only way to beat them: play down to their craven see-no-evil, hear-no-evil, welfare collecting Eurotrash level. A style of play that the NHL and its officials are all too happy to facilitate.
Lets get the ugly for this game out of the way first: The Officiating. The refs were absolutely brutal in the second period—both of Detroit’s goals that period came as a result of blatant penalties and blown calls that two of the four “best refs” should NEVER miss.
Jonathan Ericsson tied the game for the Red Wings on a slapshot from the point—had Mikael Samuelsson not interfered with Evgeni Malkin off the faceoff, Malkin would’ve covered Ericsson and almost certainly prevented Ericsson’s shot. No penalty was called, and Detroit scored.
Detroit’s second goal came after Marian Hossa slashed Penguins’ forward Pascal Dupuis’ stick in two, just before keeping the puck in the Detroit zone and helping set up the go-ahead goal.
Actually—I might have this somewhat wrong. Detroit might be nothing more than Iranian terrorists, and the refs are their Eurotrash enablers. Okay—I won’t go that far. Detroit is just full of Eurotrash who are really good at taking advantage of the NHL’s officiating welfare state.
The good for Pittsburgh: They got a lead in Detroit. They had great opportunities go off the inside of Osgood’s far post. They were denied a goal/penalty shot for the second consecutive night because Henrik Zetterberg is a cheater and again closed his hand on a puck in the crease. Tonight, it might have even been across the goal line. Crosby was at least visible tonight, but it’s not much of an improvement if his visibility is setting up plays that result in a post or hitting the post himself on a goal that he should finish.
Evgeni Malkin dropped the gloves with Zetterberg. It’s great to see Malkin playing a complete game and wanting to win so badly. I only wish Satan and the linesman didn’t get in the way, because I think he was going to break Zetterberg’s nose or jaw, and I really wish he had.
The bad for Pittsburgh: They can’t finish. They’ve had chances to beat Osgood in both games, and they’ve hit posts or thrown the puck right into Osgood’s body. It doesn’t help that the officials can’t see anything and have apparently swallowed their whistles with no intent of shitting them out before next October.
Chris Kunitz is still totally useless.
The good for Detroit: They’re up 2-0. Their fourth line has given them their only two legitimate goals in the series and is playing great. Chris Osgood again made some insane saves on Pittsburgh’s best chances that didn’t hit the post. Home teams winning the first two games of the Stanley Cup Finals are 31-1, historically. Detroit is now 25-0 in their last 25 playoff games in which they’ve lead after two.
Detroit is also likely getting Datsyuk and Draper back for Game 3.
The bad for Detroit: Sidney Crosby found a way to get open and make plays. It’s not a matter of if, but when he finds his way there.
The state of the series: Pittsburgh has to win the next two. They came back from 0-2 against the Capitals to win in 7, but Detroit is a much, much better team than Washington. It’s a bad night to be a Penguins fan, and in all likelihood (that 31-1 stat is pretty damning) there’s one worse night that’s not too far off.
Step 2: ???
Step 3: Collect welfare er score goal.
The Penguins talked about how they learned all of the right lessons from losing last year’s Stanley Cup Finals to Detroit. It’s obvious that they learned nothing. The only lesson you can learn from Detroit is how to be Eurotrash. The only way to beat them: play down to their craven see-no-evil, hear-no-evil, welfare collecting Eurotrash level. A style of play that the NHL and its officials are all too happy to facilitate.
Lets get the ugly for this game out of the way first: The Officiating. The refs were absolutely brutal in the second period—both of Detroit’s goals that period came as a result of blatant penalties and blown calls that two of the four “best refs” should NEVER miss.
Jonathan Ericsson tied the game for the Red Wings on a slapshot from the point—had Mikael Samuelsson not interfered with Evgeni Malkin off the faceoff, Malkin would’ve covered Ericsson and almost certainly prevented Ericsson’s shot. No penalty was called, and Detroit scored.
Detroit’s second goal came after Marian Hossa slashed Penguins’ forward Pascal Dupuis’ stick in two, just before keeping the puck in the Detroit zone and helping set up the go-ahead goal.
Actually—I might have this somewhat wrong. Detroit might be nothing more than Iranian terrorists, and the refs are their Eurotrash enablers. Okay—I won’t go that far. Detroit is just full of Eurotrash who are really good at taking advantage of the NHL’s officiating welfare state.
The good for Pittsburgh: They got a lead in Detroit. They had great opportunities go off the inside of Osgood’s far post. They were denied a goal/penalty shot for the second consecutive night because Henrik Zetterberg is a cheater and again closed his hand on a puck in the crease. Tonight, it might have even been across the goal line. Crosby was at least visible tonight, but it’s not much of an improvement if his visibility is setting up plays that result in a post or hitting the post himself on a goal that he should finish.
Evgeni Malkin dropped the gloves with Zetterberg. It’s great to see Malkin playing a complete game and wanting to win so badly. I only wish Satan and the linesman didn’t get in the way, because I think he was going to break Zetterberg’s nose or jaw, and I really wish he had.
The bad for Pittsburgh: They can’t finish. They’ve had chances to beat Osgood in both games, and they’ve hit posts or thrown the puck right into Osgood’s body. It doesn’t help that the officials can’t see anything and have apparently swallowed their whistles with no intent of shitting them out before next October.
Chris Kunitz is still totally useless.
The good for Detroit: They’re up 2-0. Their fourth line has given them their only two legitimate goals in the series and is playing great. Chris Osgood again made some insane saves on Pittsburgh’s best chances that didn’t hit the post. Home teams winning the first two games of the Stanley Cup Finals are 31-1, historically. Detroit is now 25-0 in their last 25 playoff games in which they’ve lead after two.
Detroit is also likely getting Datsyuk and Draper back for Game 3.
The bad for Detroit: Sidney Crosby found a way to get open and make plays. It’s not a matter of if, but when he finds his way there.
The state of the series: Pittsburgh has to win the next two. They came back from 0-2 against the Capitals to win in 7, but Detroit is a much, much better team than Washington. It’s a bad night to be a Penguins fan, and in all likelihood (that 31-1 stat is pretty damning) there’s one worse night that’s not too far off.
Posted by JasonPie at 5/31/2009 10:13 PM 
Categories: 2009 Stanley Cup Playoffs
Tags: Stanley Cup Detroit Red Wings Pittsburgh Penguins
Categories: 2009 Stanley Cup Playoffs
Tags: Stanley Cup Detroit Red Wings Pittsburgh Penguins
Does that "welfare" extend to Malkin's automatic suspension being overturned?
Or is it because Gino's also "eurotrash"?
Also, we like posting final scores somewhere in our game recaps, however painful.
Reply to this
I think everyone knew that giving Malkin the "instigator" was a mistake--including Babcock. If the other team's coach, in the press conference says "I don't think anything will or should come of it," then it's tough to call it anything other than the right call.
That and if I were the league, I would be ready to go out of my way to not back last night's officials on just about anything.
The bottom line is that for the Red Wings, "playing hard" is all that matters, and rules are just things that (don't) get in the way. I think it's awful for a sport to have games called one way until its Finals, where they're then called differently. Since that's how it is, the Penguins need to start setting picks off faceoffs, slashing sticks, diving on pucks in the crease, and otherwise playing so hard as to show no regard for the rules.
Reply to this
"Zetterberg is a cheater."
Holy shit. Are you gonna be ok?
Does Zetterberg tattle tale too? Did he wear his tball uniform to school when the coach specifically told him not to? Fuck.
Here's what he did do: he shut down your hero for the 8th straight SCF game.
Christ, I thought I whined a lot.
Reply to this
Did you actually watch the alleged "slash" or did you just listen to Pierre McGuire whine? Duipuis' stick didn't break until he spun around and broke it on Hossa's skate while trying to slash him.
Maybe you wouldn't cry so much if your stars actually scored when they were on breakaways. To this point Osgood has owned the NHL, er Pittsburgh Penguins.
Also, you should direct your anger at the non-eurotrash talent from the Grand Rapids Griffins that are tearing Pittsburgh up. The AHL's finest has more points than Crosby and Malkin combined.
Reply to this
You're the only person in the world--of people that actually watched the slash--to think that Dupuis broke his stick on Hossa.
But I really don't see how a failure to score on a breakaway in Game 1 is related to the Red Wings getting two goals as a result of committing penalties that weren't called. And the way you talk, Abdelkader has two hat tricks...he's scored the only two non-fluke, legitimate goals for Detroit, but I'd hardly call "tearing that up."
Also, two goals = 2 points, which = Malkin's point total. But you obviously have all the facts right.
Reply to this
People currently playing for the Wings that started and played a majority of the season in Grand Rapids (as Griffins).
Abdelkader: 2 goals
Helm: 1 assist
Leino: 1 assist
Ericsson: 1 goal
Total: 5 points
Crosby/Malkin combined: 2 points.
Reply to this
Pie,
It's good to see you finally took time to watch the video and THEN write a comment. Also, I do have my facts right and anytime the NHL's poster child has less points (read: goals AND assists) than some minor leaguers then he is being torn up.
I'm glad J.J. from Kansas took the time to have a mind-numbing discussion with you about a whiny, poorly written blog entry because I couldn't handle it.
Reply to this
You guys made a mistake getting this guy to do your SCF game-by-game. What a joke. This couldn't be worse if you had a Blues fan doing it.
Reply to this
I think fans of all teams can agree:
Pierre McGuire is completely unlistenable.
However, I am impressed that everytime he's on camera, he finds a way to get his STANLEY CUP RING into the shot.
Reply to this
I'm impressed that he constantly manages to literally look like a penis in a suit.
I'm also impressed by Mike Milbury's restraint every moment Milbury refrains from beating McGuire with his own shoe.
(Not that that blowhard's any better himself.)
Reply to this
Wondering if your resident Pens homer has seen this about the Hossa "slash" yet.
http://www.kuklaskorner.com/index.php/a2y/comments/more_fun_with_hockey_sticks
Reply to this
That video only tells half the story--if you watch this video and freeze frame at the 4 second mark:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZ8LAgf7ID4&eurl=http://smilinlikeabutchersdog.blogspot.com/&feature=player_embedded
You'll see something that looks way too much like a hook to not be a hook.
The broken stick came from Dupuis having to turn to play the puck because he was hooked. My bad, I called a hook a slash.
Thanks for helping me get it right.
Reply to this
This is like the Zapruder film.
How about Zetterberg grabbing the puck in the crease?
Reply to this
You mean the stick lift? Yeah, I thought it was a great play too. He turned to play the puck because his stick got lifted and he lost control of it, not because he got hooked.
From behind, it looks like it could be either. That's the only concession I'll make to this whole argument. Until somebody produces the magical angle that shows whether or not Hossa's stick gets in on Dupuis' hands, it's all a guessing game. We all get the benefit of watching replays over and over and over. The refs don't. If you can't call that a 100% hook even after viewing the replay several dozen times, you can hardly fault the refs for not calling it in real time.
Reply to this
Sorry, this will be the last time I harp on this, but some intrepid video work has come out that has a second angle.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLw3WVyD6tE
Start at the 2:49 mark. If you pause it at 2:52 you can CLEARLY see Hossa's stick is below Dupuis' hand, lifting his stick.
If that's not conclusive enough evidence that there absolutely should have been no call on Hossa, then I'm afraid I can't help you.
Reply to this
"He hooked his stick."
"That's a veteran call right there...we've seen that being called every single time."
His stick was parallel to the ice, and the shaft of Hossa's stick is preventing Dupuis from using his right leg to turn or even further shield Hossa from the puck. It's a textbook definition of a hook: stick parallel to ice, impeding player's ability to play the puck.
The Canadians are unbiased in this--I'll trust their announcers who have watched a lot more hockey games than anyone posting on this site to know what's been called consistently throughout the season--that hook surely qualifies.
And a CBC replay hardly qualifies as "intrepid video work." Or maybe you were just listening to it on mute and ignoring what their commentators thought?
Reply to this
Hossa's stick was under Dupuis's stick, lifting it. The announcers mistakenly thought it was the other way around. I'm sure that if you gave them the benefit of 18 hours worth of video review on that play, they'd call it exactly the way I saw it.
Pierre McGuire has probably watched more hockey than you or I in our lifetimes too, that doesn't stop him from being wrong from time-to-time.
Reply to this
PIE - you're a dumbass if you don't know the difference between a stick check and a hook and while your in the euro bashing spirit how about that pussy havlat, although it looks like you have some serious man love for patrick kane.
Reply to this
Uh, he's a Pens fan? He probably doesn't care about Havlat.
Reply to this
are you sure abouth that CT? did you happen to look at all the blackhawk shit this guy has posted all over blog
Reply to this
I didn't notice anything Blackhawks related that's been posted on this blog.
Unless you're talking about the Blackhawks content that Fork and myself have been supplying for the past year, you fucking cretin.
This is PIE's 3rd post. He's a Pens fan who we brought in to give us their perspective on the Finals. Feel free to argue with him all you want, but maybe you should look around first?
Thanks.
Reply to this
"Fork and myself"...be thankful Slats doesn't have Web access...
Reply to this
Actually--if you watch the video on HD, at 2:52, you see that there's no white space between Hossa's stick and Dupuis' glove. Clearly, there's contact between the two. The argument that "Hossa's stick was below Dupuis' hands" is about the dumbest argument ever.
Of course it was, because it was lifting them.
If you watch earlier around 2:40, you see Dupuis' hands move and come up as Hossa's stick comes up. Since this evidence is good enough for every commentator who's seen it, I'll trust the people who know about hockey.
Reply to this
No, the "dumbest argument ever" is using a player's country of origin to impugn him, especially when your top forward and top defenseman are both from across the pond.
That's beside the point. Hossa lifted the stick, of course that's going to cause Dupuis' hands to come up.
Reply to this
Russia is part of Europe? So that means Sarah Palin can see Europe from Alaska, right?
Yeah, yeah, I know it spans two continents, but until it's a part of the EU, Russia doesn't get counted as "European."
Reply to this
What in the hell are you talking about?
While we're arguing this stupid bullshit, can I ask if Switzerland isn't European by your standards?
So I guess only Gonchar gets thrown under the bus in Pie's grand Eugenics plan... It must hurt to be as stupid as you are. To continue to argue further with you will only make me more stupid. I have alcohol to do that, I don't need your help.
Reply to this
I assume you're taking a backhanded shot at Crosby by arguing that Malkin's better, and then equating Malkin and Gonchar with Europeans as "across the pond."
Unless you mean the other pond off the Western United States, your comment made no sense. Russia is decidedly "not European," and there's a good reason you hear about "European" players and then "Russian" players.
Or were you making a Jagr reference? I don't think any amount of alcohol can make your initial point, or the eugenics joke make sense.
Reply to this
I promised myself I wasn't going to do this again, but here I am.
First off, why does it have to be a shot at Crosby to call Malkin a better player? I didn't say Crosby sucks. I think he's a fantastic player and he's going to continue getting better. I just think that Malkin is better. You Penguins fans are so sensitive about any perceived slight against Crosby. Get over it you whiner.
Just to be clear about your second point, it's only European players that are trash, right? Not Russians? I just want to make sure I know precisely how far your xenophobic idiocy extends.
Reply to this
Congrats, Pie - you've gotten more non-spam comments than any post we've ever had.
Reply to this
are you sure abouth that CT? did you happen to look at all the blackhawk shit this guy has posted all over blog
Reply to this