There are things that lurk deep in everyone's souls. The things they don't want to admit they know. The things they want to not be true. Things that lurk in the darkest corners of your subconscious, huddled in the shadows along with the time you walked in on your parents in the vinyl gear and Beck's "Sexxlaws" video.

But brace yourself, because I'm hitting you right now with a Shea Weber slapshot of truth.

If a 22 year old makes $6 million a year and gets the summer off, he will party.

Wow...damn, it felt good to finally come to grips with that.

So anyway, Deadspin ran an article yesterday about Kane. They've gone to the Kane well a couple times, not that I can blame them. We've all had our fun with Kane. Between limo pictures, bar scenes, and all the war stories that have floated around, there's been plenty of fodder for all of us to goof on. Although, the "mysterious" black eye was received while Kane was plying his trade, during Game 7 in Vancouver.

The girl who put the pictures up on her Twitter account shut that account down yesterday.

Truthfully, there's only only one surprise here - that Kane is constantly being photographed with 6s and 7s. You'd think a Stanley Cup winner with heavy bank would move up in class. Shit, if Chris Campoli coulsn't even teach him that much, there's no point in bringing him back.

Based upon the trim Kaner's been pulling, I guess we should be happy he works for the Hawks on the ice and not in the front office, since his abilities in the area of talent evaluation are obviously wanting. Although, at least he approaches the art of cherchez la femme the same way he approaches the game - take as many shots as you can, score a lot, and the ugly ones still count.

But as long as Kane is going to party in and around Chicago, Galway Bay on May 27 would be a solid option. The Malört is on us. In the meantime, fans of the franchise that is erecting statues of Bobby Hull and Stan Mikita outside the United Center should maybe relax a little.