HOCKEE NIGHT

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VIEW FROM THE TOP: Florida Panthers

After what can only be described as the most boring offseason in history (despite the creation of our brand new team), the NHL is finlly almost ready to spring it’s patented brand of fun mixed with chronic stupidity on its unsuspecting fanbase (the NHL sounds a lot like Hockeenight now that I think about it).  But we can’t start a season without a vague and useless analysis of each and every team, helpfully pegged to a completely arbitrary standard!  Thus we are pleased to announce the return of “View From The Top”.

The last time Dale Tallon was GM of a team with an abundance of young talent, he had names  like  Toews, Kane, Keith…future Hall of Famers. Last year they shot a season with young talent all to hell when they fired the greatest coach in Vegas Golden Knights history, Gerard Gallant. Gallant wanted a team built for speed and then-GM Tom Rowe wanted more size. So Rowe took over behind the bench and oversaw the end of the dumpster fire. So Tallon, who thought he was done with all that GM shit, resumed that role and hired Bob Boughner, to the delight of all of us here at Hockeenight.

FORWARDS:

They let their top goal scorer, Jonathan Marchessault, go to Vegas in the expansion draft. They also sent Reilly Smith to our beloved Knights. And they let Jaromir Jagr walk. So that’s roughly 70 goals, gone. Pretty bold strategy. They still have Aleksander Barkov, Nick Bjugstad and Jonathan Hoobadoo, but it gets pretty thin after that, unless they think 28-year-old KHL expatriate Evgeny Dadonov can bend the twine more than 20 times.

DEFENSE:

They have the oft-concussed Aaron Ekblad. After that, it’s a squadron of Donalds.

GOALTENDING:

Roberto Luongo is the greatest goalie in the history of Twitter.

MUNDANE FACT:

Florida is the only NHL team that will have more white belts and shoes in the stands than Vegas.

ARE THEY BETTER THAN THE LAS VEGAS GOLDEN KNIGHTS:

Considering they gave the Knights their coach and top scorer, I’d say no.

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